As we know, our mind and thoughts very powerful. If we learn how to manage our thoughts, we will be able to eliminate many unhappy thoughts, sadness, depression, stress and anxiety. If we learn some of the thinking logic below, we will find that our life will be much happier and less stress.
There Is No Absolute Right Or Wrong
We may think that certain acts are wrong or wicked or villainous, and people who perform them should be severely punished. However in life, there are no absolute rights or wrongs. There are things that people do that we wouldn’t do; things they do that we consider inappropriate or antisocial; and things we wish they wouldn’t do. However these people are not bad people. Simply blaming them does no good. Punishing them does little, if any, good and often does harm. If we analyze why they did something, we can almost always see the sense of it from their point of view. Thus, their actions could be expected.
If they were wrong, at least as we view things, in what they did, it is generally due to stupidity, ignorance, or emotional disturbance; so we should be very tolerant of their behavior and try to educate, redirect, and help them change to more desirable behavior. If we do so, we all come out ahead in the end.
Likewise, we should give ourselves the same break. If someone doesn’t like what we do, we should not become anxious or upset about It. We should recognize that, within their framework, our behavior seems inappropriate. We should not be blamed for that, Nor should we become anxious and depressed about it. The rational thing to do is to compare ideas, discuss it, and see if we can learn from the experience. One or both of us may change, or we may agree to disagree, but we do better that way than by engaging in blaming and mutual hostility over a period of time that leaves us both losers.
Accept The Fact That Nothing Can Be Perfect And To Your Liking
It is a terrible catastrophe when things are not as we would like them to be. It is silly and childish when we think about it clearly, but many times we do proceed with the implicit assumption that the world and everything in it should be just the way we want it to be. We are deeply offended and outraged by all signs that it is not so.
However, with all the different kinds of people in the world, it could not possibly be to everyone’s liking. Also, the harsh reality of the universe is that it was not created only for our pleasure and to revolve around us personally. Therefore, we have to accept that the world, even our corner of it, will never be exactly the way we would like it. We should not expect it to be. When we see something we don’t like, it does no good to perceive it as a personal insult or an attempt to defeat us. What one should do is to say, “That is too bad” or “I don’t like that,” and then try to do something constructive to change or improve it. As someone has said, “if you are unavoidably dealt a lemon in life, you may as well make some lemonade.”
On the other hand, if the situation can’t be improved at all, then we should resign ourselves to accepting it , realizing that this is sometimes the nature of things; instead of getting emotionally upset and stressed over it. We often tell our children that they have to realize that they can’t have everything they want. Sometimes, though, as adults we make the same error in more subtle, sophisticated ways. When we do, it can only lead to unnecessary upset and anxiety.